The best advice you'll ever get from me

Don't put the cloth you used to wipe up mineral turpentine in your washing machine.

That's it. That's the single greatest piece of advice I can give you, and it is hard won. Yesterday I washed a turps cloth, because I didn't know you weren't supposed to, and BEHOLD, not only did my washing machine stink of turps, but the clothes I innocently loaded in next--naively believing that okay, the machine was a bit whiffy, but this load would surely take care of that--ALSO came out reeking of turpentine. And the machine still stank!

A front-loading washing machine with a bottle of mineral turpentine carefully--SO carefully--balanced in the door, after I checked the cap was screwed on tight
Evil.

At that point, I turned to the internet. Redditors had cheerfully advised previous makers of this mistake to just throw out the clothes. In this situation, that would involve sacrificing several handmade pieces AND all of my most comfortable underwear, so I sought further. The advise was to soak in a vinegar rinse overnight, and airdry.

Great. Except New Zealand is having a (climate change induced) wet summer, so airdrying didn't mean items bobbing cheerfully on the washing line, but slung over the rack in my living room. I persevered. Most of my clothes are now stink free. I tossed out one nylon slip, but everything with some cotton content has been preserved. Hurrah for natural fibres!

This left the washing machine itself. I put it on successive hot wash cycles. With detergent. With vinegar. With baking soda. With vinegar again. With a washing machine cleaner and deodoriser of mysterious ingredients. I held my breath and washed a towel I don't like that much, with a clothing deodoriser tossed in there. The towel is currently in the dryer, which is my garage, next to my office, with the door open as I write this newsletter, because the other thing Reddit told me was that if I put anything that had even the tiniest bit of turpentine still on it in the dryer, it would CATCH ON FIRE. I am observing progress carefully, but I can no longer smell turpentine.

To be honest, I can no longer smell much of anything. For nearly twenty-four hours, I have been sticking my head into a washing machine and sniffing furiously at intervals. Adulthood is sometimes freedom and power and getting to take risks and make decisions like "I am going to quit working full time and see if I can finally write again" (yes) and sometimes it is chores on chores on chores. Today I took my car to the mechanic to replace a car side mirror. I got a hair cut from curls magician Tash. I bought groceries. I made my machine that is supposed to wash clothes wash itself instead, over and over and over.

I am forty-four years old and I learn at least five new things every day. This one, I am passing on: never put cloth that's touched turps in the washing machine. If you already knew that, I am happy for you! If you didn't, please, learn from me. This is my best gift to you.

Book stuff!

  • The last of the Kickstarter rewards have been packaged and shipped. (A few hardcover books have been held up in Tennessee, for... reasons? I don't know, don't worry, I'm on it.)

Packaging in progress, a couple of Ephemera unboxing pics, and the delicious little cake I ate as my reward for getting it all done.

  • Magician First Class is available for pre-order at Amazon - it will also be going into Kindle Unlimited the moment it's released, so ready your reading time!

My mum's review is that she likes the community rec center storyline, but there's all this distracting stuff about magic and werewolves and vampires. Personally, I feel this is a strong recommendation to a certain kind of reader. If you, also, would like to review Magician First Class, please do!

  • My Patreon income is at exactly $125/month (thank you, Patrons!), which means I am exactly halfway to the first milestone goal of $250/month. At that point, in addition to getting early copies of all my e-books, every Patron will be getting a serialized story, one chapter a month.

Just as in days of old, your patronage directly impacts my ability to work. I chose $250 as that goal very deliberately, because after taxes and fees (which takes about half of that) that will come to roughly what I'm paid for a day at my casual day job. If I can spend one day a month writing a serial instead, I would like to do that! And Patrons will get to vote on what I write. Check out the Patreon here.

That Healey Girl is the newsletter of Karen (or Kate) Healey, a romance and speculative fiction author who lives in Ōtautahi, New Zealand and shakes plots loose by wandering along the river. Please feel free to forward this newsletter to anyone you think might enjoy it.